Date: May 4-5, 2013
Series: Christian
Message:
Passage: 1 Corinthians 5:1-12 and Matthew 7:1-5
INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES
WHAT BUGS YOU ABOUT THE HOLLYWOOD LIFESTYLE?
Leader note: Try to let everyone jump in on something they disagree with that Hollywood represents or promotes to them.
Commentary:
- Manipulations
- Vulgarity
- New spouse all the time
- Extravagant lifestyles
- Sex
- Drug use
UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES
WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT JUDGING?
Leader note: Answer this from your previous Bible knowledge or what you’ve heard.
Most people will have heard the verse: Judge Not lest you be judged
READ 1 CORINTHIANS 5:1-12 AND MATTHEW 7:1-5. WHAT DO YOU LEARN ABOUT JUDGING?
Leader note: People may be surprised that the Bible actually tells us TO judge – but only others in the family of God.
Commentary: The Bible tells us who to judge and the way to judge them:
- those inside the church who are called “brothers and sisters” not outsiders of the church
- “immoral, greedy, idolaters, adultery, drunkenness, sins of the flesh, swindlers …”
- These are observable sins, “lifestyle sins”
- The passage we are dealing with a man sleeping with his stepmother.
WHAT DO WE TEND TO DO WITH “IMMORAL” CHURCH GOERS?
- Cut them loose
- Let them hit rock bottom
- Stop trying to help, they won’t receive it
WHY DO WE CUT THEM LOOSE?
- Taint the reputation of the church
- “hypocrites”
- They don’t live up to the standards set by God in the church
- It is a strategy of love-implement tough love so that we can eventually restore them to the church “let them back in.” The church is bad at both of these.
- Judging in this scripture is strategy of love, love the person, love the church, love the community.
- The person will feel judged, rejected, ostracized…like an intervention.
- We have conformed to their character
Leader Note: You can look at 2 Corinthians 2:5-11, where Paul explains restoration back to the church.
WHAT DOES THE PASSAGE SAY ABOUT THE “OUTSIDERS”?
- Don’t judge
- It is God’s business
- Don’t expect non-believers to act like believers, They do not subscribe to our beliefs
- “Be with them” – Often the Church says don’t be with them, Jesus never teaches that
- How far is too far in “being with them?”
- Encouraging their behavior
- Marrying them
- Indulging in their sin
- Why do we not judge? Matthew 7 plank and “do not judge lest you be judged”
- When you judge someone else you are identifying sin in yourself
UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES
WHERE DO YOU SEE PEOPLE BEING TOO LAX WITH “INSIDERS”? WHERE DO YOU SEE PEOPLE REFUSING TO RESTORE THEM?
Note: Another way to ask this is, “where are people too afraid to give tough love to other Christians?
- Where do you see churches/Christians fearing the confront/restore binary?
- Inside-too lax/lenient? Too harsh. Too lax on choices/addictions/justifications/gossip/political views
- Outside-Looking at Hollywood—what makes me angry? Pushing the group to recognize “the outsiders are me.” What they do is a problem, but why am I threatened by it?
Examples:
- Small groups – people don’t want to call each other out, or hold each other accountable
- People living together
- Addictions
- Parents of high-schoolers providing or allowing alcohol, condoning sexual behavior.
- Gossiping
- Debt/money things
WHAT IS THE COST OF BEING TOO LENIENT?
Commentary:
It makes the family of God weaker We look like hypocrites when behavior is tolerated within the church and criticized outside The behaviors can be thought of as accepted, thereby increasing the immorality
WHERE DO YOU SEE PEOPLE JUDGING OUTSIDERS? WHAT IS THE COST?
Leader note: Your group may not have to go much further than how they answered the first question about Hollywood. But don’t stop the conversation there – consider anywhere you have seen “Non-Christians” being held to “Christian” standards. What is the cost? Does it attract people to Jesus? Does it give Christians a bad name?
APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES
Leader Note: You may not want to tackle both the “insider” and “outsider” applications – depending on your particular group and the time you have left. You may already know that your group struggles with one relationship more than the other and steer your group that direction. Questions for both sides of the discussion are provided.
WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH OUTSIDERS?
Leader note: There are typically two extreme positions – either separate and judge, or associate and join the behavior. Neither of these extremes are productive.
WHAT MAKES YOU AFRAID OF HAVING A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM?
- I might get sucked in
- Being with them could make me look bad
- I don’t want to “condone” their behavior
WHICH PART OF THE “INSIDER” JUDGEMENT DO YOU STRUGGLE WITH? CONFRONTATION OR RESTORATION?
WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF IN THESE TWO TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS? WHAT WOULD IT LOOK LIKE TO LET THAT FEAR GO?
- Inside: Why am I afraid to give/too quick to give tough love? What is the cost to the person being judged and to us as the church?
- Outside- What is the barrier to me loving those on the outside? What do I have to let go of in my life to love them on the outside? If you don’t give judgment, you can give compassion and love.
LIVE IT OUT
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IN OUR COMMUNITY, ESPECIALLY THOSE OUTSIDE OF THE CHURCH, IF WE STOPPED JUDGING THEM?
PRAY: As you end your time together ask God to convict you through the week to notice how you are responding to the directives of this passage. Who do you need to confront in your church family? Who do you need to stop holding to your value system that doesn’t ascribe to your faith foundation? Ask God to forgive you for past judgments you have held over others outside of the Church and to bring to mind ways to love them in place of the fear you’ve held onto.