Date: May 18-19, 2013
Series: Christian?
Message: Two Lost Sons
Passage: Luke 15:1-2a, 11-32
INTRODUCTION – 10 MINUTES
When did you think something was lost, and then found it?
Leader note: This question is easy to answer, try to get everyone to think of a time they lost something and then found it. For instance, maybe they lost their wedding ring and found it later – have them talk about how they felt when it was lost, and then when it was found.
OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES
Read 15:1-2a. Who is Jesus’ audience?
Sinners, tax collectors and Pharisees
Read Luke 15-11-32. What do you learn about the misbehaving son?
Leader note: We will be reading the entire passage through verse 32, however, break it into the segments focusing on each person in the story as it will help your group identify with the various characteristics and emotions for each one, and find themselves in the story.
Commentary: (some of the answers your group should find)
- Entitled – road to happiness is money
- Money is freedom
- Not patient
- Ambitious, independent
- Bold, impulsive
- Insensitive – in shame honor society,
- Asking for inheritance – I wish you were dead, and older brother dead
- Public shame because the property would have to be sold to give the money
- Wild living, pigs and prostitutes
*In those days property was kept for generations – didn’t earn it back
- He’s foolish
- Prideful
- Learns the hard way
- Up until this time he was out of his senses – insane
Was he brought back because of humility or calculating?
Both –
- Had to get to the point where he was wrong
- Throughout the story he’s been self-centered…
Read Luke 15:22-24. What do you learn about the father with the younger son?
- Gracious
- Forgiving
- Enabling, empowering
- Compassionate
- Patient
- Strong and humble
- Faithful
Read Luke 15:25-30“Behaving older brother”?
Leader note: Another way to think of this brother is as a “rule follower”, or someone doing the right thing for God. That will help your group get to the point where they may identify themselves as the older brother (the church-goer, follow rules, live ethically, etc.)
- Hard working
- Self-righteous
- Bitter
- Angry
- Entitled
- Judgmental
- Critical
- Unforgiving
Read Luke 15:25-32. What do you learn about the father with the older son?
Commentary:
- He left his own party to talk to his son who was bringing shame on him by not joining in the celebration
- He reminds the older son everything is his, he didn’t lose anything because the younger son got what he wanted.
- He said we have to celebrate finding what was lost
- Neither son earned what they were given, it was the father’s to give
- Doesn’t take any of his grace away by extending it to the younger son
2b. What does the younger son and older son have in common?
- Both want to be out from the authority of the father
- Both shame the father
- Don’t love the father
- They are loved by the father
- Both dislike the other
- How are they pursuing happiness – older – work hard, moralistic, being good
UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES
Where have you seen examples of the “younger brother”?
Why does their behavior make you angry?
Leader note: By asking the question this way you will help your group discover that they are the “older brother” in the story. They will find themselves identifying those who are entitled, succeed “unfairly”, etc and their anger toward that person or group of people and will find themselves angry. In the application question you will be making this personal and helping them discover the root of their anger.
APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES
When have you been angry at God?
Leader note: You should notice that your group falls into the “older brother” category. Therefore they should have situations where they were angry with God because the fell upon hard times, someone “undeserving” got something they wanted, or they felt as though they deserve something and didn’t get it.
Leader tip: When someone shares a powerful story others may come around them and derail the discussion completely. Can be an avoidance tactic if someone has a powerful story. The leader needs to be reminded to respond to the story, but then move to the next person to share. There is a time to come around the hurting person and pray, etc – but keep the discussion going to make sure everyone shares and they don’t get an easy out from facing their own anger or issue.
Some sample answers you might hear from your group:
- when I was dating my wife I went to a church that basically promised that if I stayed pure I would have a great marriage – when we got married it was really tough for the first few years and I was mad at God. I kept thinking I did what I was supposed to do and you didn’t keep up your side of the deal.
- When my mom was sick we had her prayed over, anointed for healing, she was a good Christian and yet she died, and we thought it was because we didn’t have enough faith.
- My husband and I raised our kids in the church, they have known God since they were little, we prayed with them and did the best we could to keep them focused on God – but two of them had problems at school – big publicized issues and I kept wondering why did that happen to MY kids? I’m raising them right…
What were your thoughts about God during that time?
- I did right – you didn’t
- I did good – you failed me
- You make no sense
- It wasn’t fair
- I can do better than you – I know the answer
- He’s not sufficient
- He’s mean
- He’s unfair
- He’s not loving
- He plays favorites
- He’s more gracious with others
What is the fear behind the anger? What’s the truth you need to believe?
Leader note: By identifying the underlying issue of the anger you can begin to see the response needed from the Father. For instance, if the underlying fear of publicized rebellion of a child is keeping your reputation clean – you may need the truth that the Father loved you through rebellion, His grace is sufficient for you and for your children, and to remind you how to wait for the time they come back – wait anxiously and ready to celebrate.
- If the fear is being alone you may need to believe He is with me.
- If the fear is not having an easy marriage you may need to hold onto the truth that you have the power to move first toward making it better.
- If the fear is that you may endure suffering, the truth you may need to hold onto is even in that He’s working, He’s bigger than the suffering.
LIVE IT OUT
In our community there are both younger and older brothers – what would happen if we responded like the father?
Pray: At the end of your time together pray for God’s grace to cover all of the “older brother” attitudes you may have had toward others. Ask God to remind you of His forgiveness, acceptance and restoration in your own life. Pray for the opportunity to offer celebration for the lost that return and for the rule followers, those standing in a place of false superiority – that God will give them opportunities to embrace humility.