Author: flowmaster

James 1:19-20, 3:3-9 // Relationology Wk 2

Date:  January 19-20, 2013
Series:  Relationology
Message:  Words With Friends
Passages:  James 1:19-20 and James 3:3-9

Life group leader teaching moment:

Remember, you cannot take people further than you are spiritually. You may be able to give them truth, but to direct and guide someone through spiritual growth or transformation you have to bring the truths through your own life first.  You can’t ask someone to do what you haven’t done – in other words, the messenger and the message are one in the same.  Jesus couldn’t just say – “you must lay down your life” without doing it Himself.  Jesus couldn’t just talk about serving or loving others, He had to live it first.  He was the messenger of an embraced message.  To bring your group members to the next level, you need to experience it first.

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

 

Who would you say are better listeners – men? Or women?   Why do you think that?

Important Leader note:  For this entire discussion, you want to protect married couples from finger-pointing, or taking these prompts to accuse one another.  Instead, keep the discussion general – you may even want to instruct your group to not include the relationships in the group at this point, but only those they’ve witnessed or understand to be true.

Leader note:  This should get a fun debate going regardless of the dynamics of your group.  The general consensus among women is that they are the best listeners, while men oftentimes think they listen better and women talk more.  What does your group think?

 

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

 

Read James 1:19-20, 3:3-9

What do you learn can build or destroy relationships from the following passages?

 

Commentary:

James 1:19-20

Build-

  • Be quick to listen
  • Slow to speak
  • Be slow to anger (anger does not produce the righteousness God desires)

James 3:3-9

  • The tongue can build or destroy relationships, depending on how it is used.
  • The tongue is small part of the body, corrupts whole body set course on fire
  • Tongue is a restless evil
  • We praise with it and curse with it
  • Words- evil, hurt people, rudder of ship, Spark of fire

What are words, or ways words curse others?

Important Leader note:  For this entire discussion, you want to protect married couples from finger-pointing, or taking these prompts to accuse one another.  Instead, keep the discussion general – you may even want to instruct your group to not include the relationships in the group at this point, but only those they’ve witnessed or understand to be true.  (This is repeated on purpose)

 

Commentary:   Hurtful words, arrogant, unchecked, insulting, unwise, blaming, mean, misdirected, evil, selfish

 

UNDERSTANDING – 25 MINUTES

 

What are ways people have listened to you well?  How did that build your relationship?

Leader Note:   What you want to accomplish with this question is having your group see the value in listening.  These passages from James not only highlight the destruction of words, but the value and listening, that listening is critical to a relationship – just as much as avoiding cursing the other person, using hurtful or destructive words. It is definitely a both/and, don’t let your group focus on one side of the spectrum. It’s important that each person in your group shares a story of being listened to, that is how they will really understand the value of listening – involved listening, not casual listening.

  • Listening can be valuable even without giving advise (sometimes listening is more valuable than the advice)- felt understood
  • Being present…not speak, just pray for me, just be on my side
  • Asking great engaging questions shows compassion and caring
  • Listening is learning about the person, what is being said, how you feel, not giving advice, presence and full attention,
  • Listening is slow, takes time, understanding the person more than the issue, give appropriate response- not try and solve,
  • Nonverbal communication, empathetic, repeat what say that shows understanding.
  • Temptation is to making it about your experience and not helpful…makes about listener not hearer. Action can show support

 

What are ways people “cheapen” listening?  How does that destroy the relationship, or possibility of relationship?

Some sample answers:

  • When we have agendas, we listen only waiting for a way to turn the conversation to us, or our agenda.
  • We throw out cheap words, but don’t give you time.  We ask, “How are you?” but don’t wait for the answer, and hope the answer is “fine” so we don’t have to engage.
  • We multi-task in our heads while someone is talking, not giving them our full attention.
  • This destroys relationships because people don’t feel like you care, you may come across as arrogant, flippant, or like you don’t have time for them.
  • How do you feel when not listened to?

 

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

 

Where has the power of words lifted you up and built your relationship?

 

Leader note:  Try to have everyone answer this question to help them understand the power of affirming and words that bless.

  • Affirmations at birthdays
  • They ask question….do the next, care beyond the first “how are you?”
  • Someone saying I inspire them
  • A message left on a phone that they are grateful for me in their life.
  • Encouragement when I started a new job

 

When was a time you either cheapened listening, or used “cursing” words with someone?  How did you see it affect your relationship?

Leader note:  This is a good time for people to self-select if they need to apologize, especially if it is to a spouse, family member or someone in the group.  Don’t let it turn into blaming, calling each other out, or condemn, this is a time of confession and restoration.  Oftentimes people have said words without thinking about the harm they could cause, believing they were being helpful, or just honest.  Let them see the power of the words, regardless of the intent and restore the relationship with an apology. 

You may have someone who feels as though they’ve been dismissive in how they have listened to others, let them self-select and apologize. 

Leader note:  As a leader, consider how you listen to your group, do you listen with the next question in mind?  Asking a follow up question is a great way for you as a leader to show you are truly listening.  If you have caught yourself cheapening how you listen in your group you may want to go first on this question, confess and tell the group how you will listen as you move forward and what you expect to happen to your relationships because of this.

FOR BLENDED GROUPS:  Where do you want to be a better listener in your life and where do you want to use words to build up?

FOR COUPLES GROUPS ONLY:  Use this time to have couples affirm one another for times they have listened well or spoken words that built each other and their relationship.  You can do this in a group setting, or have each couple split off and talking only to one another. 

FOR MEN ONLY OR WOMEN ONLY GROUPS:  write words of affirmation for someone in your life, what are you going to do differently?  Ask, “What benefits are there if we listen well and use our words well?”

 

LIVE IT OUT

What does it look like if we were better listeners and use kinder words in our community, our city?

 

 

 

 

 

Galatians 5:13-26 // Relationology Wk 1

DATE:  JANUARY 12-13, 2013
SERIES:  RELATIONOLOGY
MESSAGE: IN LOVE, FOR LOVE
PASSAGE:  GALATIANS 5:13-26

 

introduction – 5 MINUTES

What keeps people from great relationships?

Leader note:  Let your group just throw out answers, they don’t need to take turns answering, just call out answers as they have them.  Some of those they may come up with:

  • Bad experiences
  • Baggage
  • Trust issues
  • Abandonment
  • Insecurity – or false security
  • Pride – don’t need people
  • Strongholds – control, porn, addictions
  • Prejudice – they’re different from…difference is bad
  • Time – relationships take time
  • Selfishness – all about me, person fulfills my sense of identity
  • Unhealthy, hurt, broken – tend to sabotage
  • Personality differences, extra vs. intra, stay at home vs. party
  • Bad models of good relationships
  • Inability to manage conflict
  • Dependency/Needy and independency

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

READ GALATIANS 5:13-26.  What do YOU learn about relationships?

Leader note:  Take your time going through this passage, there is a lot of information in it.  As your group answers ask them, “where do you see that?”  Have them put it in their own words without changing the meaning.

  • Expression of freedom is to serve one another in love in relationship with one another –
    • Serve one another humbly  vs 13
    • Love your neighbor as yourself vs 14
    • Walking in the Spirit  vs 16
    • Purpose of the law – give us relationship, it is fulfilled as we love one another – (the law doesn’t offer relationship, just religion and systematic faith)
    • The law was inadequate
    • Spirit not inadequate – produces what you need, gives qualities, (love, peace, patience, joy…)
    • Walking in the spirit fights against selfishness which is the enemy
    • No limits to the fruit, whereas the law has a limit, (a cap) – certain things it can’t do
    • Can’t just man up – have to leave it to the power of the Spirit
  • Bad relationships bring death, devour – bite (speaks of appetite – when we indulge we get enslaved, but led by the Spirit there is true freedom.  v15)
  • True freedom is life in the Kingdom – God’s freedom
  • Spirit is at work to change our desires – Spirit and flesh at conflict with each other – polar opposites – can’t be brought together

Leader note: This passage offers interesting contrast between what it means to live by the flesh and by the law versus what it means to live by the Spirit.  The Law ultimately brings out the fact that we are incapable of “righteousness”.  Living under the law and by the flesh produces bondage and a sense of failure.  Walking by the Spirit brings freedom in that we are joined by a strength and grace found outside of our human efforts.  A Spirit-led life produces a whole new set of possible outcomes in our relationships with God, and with each other).

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

 

What are things that sabotage relationships?

The list from verses 19-21

  • Sexual immorality
  • Anger
  • Envy
  • Selfishness
  • Adultery/pornography
  • Superstition/sorcery/spirit world
  • Dissentions of factions/”in” group vs. “out” group
  • Division/discord – gossip, criticize, resentment
  • Drunkenness
  • “other sins like these”

 

APPLICATION -20 MINUTES

Where have you allowed the flesh to sabotage your relationships?

What fruit might the Holy Spirit be developing in you?

Leader note:  At this point when people try to self-identify the fruit the Spirit might be developing, you and the group members can to help them.  Depending on your style you can gently press in, or have others try to help pinpoint what the Spirit is working on.

Leader note:  Follow up is important when your group members make any commitment for change, reconciliation, etc – have the person who has the gift of shepherding in the group handle the follow up with the group. It can be an email, or in person the next time your group meets.

 

Before we leave, have you done anything on the list that might be affecting your relationship with someone here? 

*You can soften the question by saying something like this, “Maybe you have said something you regret, or crossed over a boundary and you want to take a minute to clear it up with that person. Anyone need to apologize to anyone in the group?”

 

OPTIONAL EXERCISE:  JOURNAL FOR ONE WEEK, AND SEE WHAT THE SPIRIT IS DOING IN YOU AND WHERE YOU SEE ANY LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS OR SELF-CONTROL BEING DEVELOPED IN YOUR LIFE.

 

LIVE IT OUT

 

If we were a group that lived less by the flesh and more by the spirit, WE WOULD SEE A DECREASE OF ______________ AND AN INCREASE OF _____________________.

 

 

Acts 2:42-47 // Walk Don’t Run

Date:  January 5-6, 2013
Passage:  Acts 2:42-47

 

This week we would like for you to take time as a group and set goals for this year.  Use the questions and Scripture below for this.  You may want to have a calendar where you can actually set dates for certain activities and events as you go through the year.  If you have someone with the gift of administration you can give them the task to take the notes and distribute them to the group.

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

Do you prefer individual or team sports?

Leader Note: This should be a fun and easy question for your group to answer. You may want to start out telling about your favorite type of sport and why you like either the individual aspects or team dynamics.

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Read Acts 2:42-47. What activities do you see the early believers participating in as a group?

Commentary from the passage:

  • They devoted themselves to the apostles teaching – studying Scripture
  • They devoted themselves to fellowship – and sharing meals (including communion)
  • They were devoted to prayer
  • They were in a deep sense of awe and they performed miracles and wonders
  • They met together, they shared everything they had
  • They were generous
  • They worshiped together at the Temple
  • They met in homes
  • They shared their meals with great joy and generosity
  • They praised God and enjoyed the goodwill of all the people
  • Each day the Lord added new believers to their fellowship

 

What did participating in those activities look like in their lives?

Leader Tip: Look at each activity and ask “What do you think it meant to devote themselves to studying Scripture?”

Leader note: It will be interesting to hear your group members answer what these activities would have meant to the early believers as it will reveal what they want from a life group. They will most likely talk about the activities that are important to them.

 

UNDERSTANDING – 15 MINUTES

Which of these activities have you experienced in your group? Which haven’t you?

Leader note: Go through the list that you made in the previous question about the early believers activities. As you go through them have your group highlight those that your group has experienced together. As they answer ask them what it has meant in their lives to experience those things. Make a special note of those things your group says they haven’t experienced as a group. As a leader you may want to see how you can work those activities into your group plan for the next year.

 

APPLICATION – 30 MINUTES

Which activities are you looking forward to as a life group? Which seem more challenging?

 

LIVE IT OUT

 What will be different in our community if we live the “Acts 2” church?

 

PRAY: End your group time together thanking God for bringing you all together to form a group as described in Scripture. Pray specifically for those areas your group highlighted that they wish were better within the group, and for opportunities to make the group stronger and to live out all aspects of Acts 2:42-47.

Luke 2:8-15 // Comfort And Joy Wk 3

 

Date:  December 8-9, 2012

Series:  Comfort and Joy

Message: True Joy

Passage:  Luke 2:8-15

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

 

WHAT DO YOU LOVE MOST ABOUT CHRISTMAS?

 Leader note:  Just have fun with this question – but move quickly as there is a lot to get to!

    • You can’t escape Jesus — the whole world is proclaiming Jesus in Christmas, making things beautiful…
    • Celebration
    • Being with family
    • Family traditions
    • childlike excitement

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

 

READ LUKE 2:8-15.  WHAT DO YOU LEARN ABOUT THE FIRST CHRISTMAS?

 

Leader note:  When someone gives an observation, ask them “where do you see that?” and then ask the group, “what does that mean – in our own words?”  This will help as you move through the question.

Commentary:

Some observations your group may find.  There are others however, do not limit it to this list, and don’t give your group this list.  Let them “observe and discover” on their own. 

  • Good news for all people
  • no fear – reassurance
  • peace
  • joy
  • comfort
  • Savior
  • glory of God
  • mystery – how is it possible
  • awe and wonder
  • ironic – hope of the world shows up as a baby
  • favor

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

 

THINK OF 3 OR 4 PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE THAT MIGHT FEEL EXCLUDED FROM THIS MESSAGE?

Leader note:  Think of those in your life, or people you know, that may feel like they either aren’t welcomed in by the message, or by those who proclaim the message (church, groups of friends, etc).

Commentary:

Some things that might make people feel excluded –

    • If sins they engage in are known by others.
    • Gay community
    • Other religions, or people raised in religions they shun or  left a bad taste for Jesus or people who believe in Jesus
    • Those who are sad, bad memories from Christmas
    • Those who you have a fractured relationship with you or God

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

 

How do I exclude or not aggressive include those people in this good news?

 

Leader note:  This may be a way for you to think about the exclusion – place yourself on the spectrum, how can you move to the left, toward direct inclusion?

 

the SPECTRUM:

← DIRECT INCLUSION — PASSIVE INCLUSION — PASSIVE EXCLUSION — DIRECT EXCLUSION →

 

Examples: 

Friend who has had affairs – I act superior, like he probably shouldn’t be in church – help enforce the idea that Christmas really isn’t for him.

I am not aggressively including a gay friend of mine.  While I want to make sure no one intentionally hurts him but I’m not pursuing him with the good news of Jesus.

I exclude my parents, I don’t invite or go to their house – we have a bad relationship and I don’t want to have them around.

I passively exclude some neighbors at different times – I’m selfish of my time I have with my family, don’t want to share it so I don’t engage them.

Friend who grew up Jewish, now she will celebrate Christmas with me but don’t talk about Jesus, now I exclude her from that part of my life.

 

WHAT COULD I DO TO HELP THEM SEE THIS IS GOOD NEWS FOR THEM?

Leader note:  In the passage it said the good news was for all people, how can you include those in your life you, even passively, exclude? 

 

PRAY:  As you end your time together, especially if you will be on break until after the Holidays, take time to pray.  Thank God for the awesome gift of Christmas, for lovingly providing a way for us to know Him, his all-sufficient grace, inclusive heart and motivation, and the path of righteousness set before us.  Pray for ways to embody the message, the good news of Christmas this year, and to include all Jesus would if He were walking alongside of you – as you shop, as you attend parties, as you make final plans for visits with family and friends.  Pray for the Lord’s provision of protection, healing, restored relationships and the embracing of joy, joy in its fullness, throughout the season and into the New Year.

 

LIVE IT OUT

What would it be like to bring good news to the excluded in our neighborhood or community?

 

How would people see the church differently if we truly included?

 

 

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 // Comfort And Joy Wk 4

Date:  December 1-2, 2012
Series:  Comfort and Joy
Message: Take Comfort
Passage:  2 Corinthians 1:3-7

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

What is one of your favorite comfort foods and when do you tend to want it most?

Leader note:  This should just be a fun and easy question to talk about.  This week we will be talking about “comfort”, so this will just be an easy way to get your group focused for the upcoming discussion.

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Read 2 Corinthians 1:3-7.  What do you learn about comfort?

Commentary:

  • Meant to be shared (just as we share in suffering so our comfort…)
  • God is the source of comfort
  • Comfort is not the opposite of suffering – not protection against suffering
  • Comfort is experienced during suffering, in the midst of suffering
  • Suffering is a given, but comfort is not (choose comfort but can’t choose suffering)
  • If (we-Paul) are distressed it is for (your) comfort and salvation – it can be overcome, example to them, if we can endure this you can endure this – which should bring comfort.
  • A person who goes through something harder than you are and you are comforted from the endurance they have – lets you know you can go through it too.
  • Comfort in spite of distress produces endurance (getting comforted in distress) – the sense God is with me, I’m not alone, gives me ability to endure.

 

Leader note:  You may want to come up with a working definition for the term comfort for the next questions.

               

UNDERSTANDING – 25 MINUTES

What does suffering look like? 

Leader note:  Come up with as many situations you can think of, make a list similar to the one below:

  • Pain
  • Sadness
  • Grief
  • Hurt
  • Divorce
  • Loss
    • Relationship
    • Innocence
    • Health
    • Stability
    • Opportunity
    • Dreams
    • Stuff and thing
  • Not feeling valued
  • Isolated
  • Feeling like you’re not loved
  • Feeling defeated

 

What is comfort “not”?

  • Not created – Can’t be manufactured
  • Not a solution
  • Not a quick fix
  • Not a replacement
  • Not a guarantee the suffering will end
  • Not revenge
  • Not removal of whatever the suffering is
  • Not having the answers to “why” the suffering

 

What does false comfort look like? 

Leader note:  People try to comfort themselves with food, drink, drugs – lots of different ways to “console” themselves, but they don’t bring real comfort.   

 

Where have you seen people bring real comfort to others? 

Leader note:  Another way to ask this would be, “What does real comfort look like?  Where have you seen that in life? 

Commentary:  Some examples of real comfort would be:

  • People coming around them, relationship, identifying with them
  • Offering hope, encouragement, empathy, compassion, relationship, peace, rest, strength

 

How was that used in other’s lives?

Leader note:  In the passage it says that we are comforted so that we can comfort – how have you seen that in your life? 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

When was a time in your life you needed comfort?  What did you pursue? 

Were you open to being comforted?

Leader note:  It may be that you have those who are in a place of suffering now and are either being comforted, or need you and your group to bring comfort.  What would that look like?  Have they tried  to “console” themselves?  How open are they to comfort – are they saying things like “No, I’ll be fine”, “I can handle it”, that closes them off to comfort.  Be gentle, but reassure them that it is one of God’s greatest gifts to have His family bring comfort to others.

Examples: 

During divorce, felt alone – afraid-unlovable- found comfort in friendship, he connected, he was loved, people reached out – especially holidays, didn’t have to look for it but people reached out. 

During a cancer scare – people prayed boldly for healing, surrounded family so they knew we were cared for.

 

How could your suffering bring comfort to someone else?

 

PRAY:  Before you end your time together, thank God for His ultimate comfort.  Pray for opportunities to bring comfort to those suffering in your family and those you come in contact with this Christmas season.  Ask for God’s prompting and guidance for how best to comfort others, and how you might uniquely bring the gift needed most – comfort and joy.

 

LIVE IT OUT

Since all comfort comes from God through his people…What would it look like for us to live as agents of God’s comfort?

Colossians 3:17 // Greater Than Wk 4

Life Group Leaders,

We hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and continue to live with overflowing and joyful thankfulness as you move into the Christmas season. 

You heard a message from Colossians this weekend and we would like for you to try something a little different in your group time.   You will take a simple and purposeful verse and discuss how you can apply it to your lives this season.  We hope you will share your thoughts and stories with us, and of course each other, as you continue to celebrate all that Christmas means.

 

Discussion for group:

Read Colossians 3:17.  Here are two different translations of the verse:

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” (NIV)
“And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.”  (NLT)

 

What does this look like as you prepare for Christmas?

Leader note:  This is a good commentary as to what this verse means and how it can be lived out:  Whatever you do – Whether preaching the word of Christ, in hearing the Gospel, in singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, and in conference and conversation with each other; or in whatever action, civil or religious throughout the whole life and conversation, in the performance of things natural, moral and evangelical, relating to God or man, or one another, in the world or church

do in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ – both in the strength of Christ, without whom nothing can be well said or done; and according to the mind and will of Christ, calling upon his name for assistance in the administration of his ordinances, and in the performance of every duty, directing all to, and having solely in view his honor and glory.

Leader note:  Consider the following as you discuss this question:

 

 

  • What does this mean when you are buying gifts?

 

 

 

Spend several minutes at the end of your time together to encourage one another in their actions this Christmas season, plan how to share stories and struggles, and come together one more time before Christmas to celebrate Christmas “different”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Life Groups Team would like to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving.  We are very grateful for all you do as leaders, and encouraging your group to grow in their relationship with Jesus as well as shepherding and caring for them.  Your dedication to this ministry is appreciated, and it is because of you, and your life group, we are seeing great advances for God’s Kingdom in our communities. 

This week, instead of discussion time focused around the weekend message with flow questions, we are hoping you will take time in a prayer time of thanksgiving, or serve with your group or as a family.  If you come together for a coporate prayer of thanksgiving you can use the following format:

5-10 MINUTES 

  • Words of Praise and Worship
  • Saying the names of God,
  • Proclaiming out loud who God is
  • Praising His attributes

 

20 MINUTES

Stories spoken to God highlighting His faithfulness, provision, answering of prayers, deliverance, etc.

 

20 MINUTES

Either out loud as a group, or individually spend time bringing to God current requests, supplications, needs, etc., and offer them in a manner of thanksgiving, (Heavenly Father, I thank you for reminding me as I seek for financial wisdom and provision, that you are already working on my behalf.  Thank you for knowing me, understanding the anxiety and worry I feel and yet you surround me with your peace, please help me Father to relinquish the worry and embrace your peace.  Thank you for your Spirit who intercedes when I am at a loss for words.  I am grateful for each day you give me, in good times and in challenges, as it is a new day to surrender, to seek you and your will, and to rejoice in your faithfulness.)

 

 

 

 

Colossians 2:8-23 // Greater Than Wk 3

Flow Questions
November 10-11, 2012
Series:  Greater Than
Passage:  Colossians 2:8-23

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

 

Separate your group into two teams – those who were born in the months of January to June, and those born July to December.  Have them come up with three reasons their birth months are better than the others.  Then give them time to tell the other team why they are better.

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Read Colossians 2:16-23 What are the false ways of belonging?

 

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

Why is this way of belonging compelling?

In these rules, what do you get that you want?  What do you get that you don’t want?

 

What are ways people have tried to belong?  What have been the results?

 

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

What are ways you’ve tried to belong?  What have been the consequences?

After everyone has had a chance to answer the question, read Colossians 2:8-15.  What is the treasure and how do we belong?

How do we belong?

 

LIVE IT OUT

 

When we’re in those false ways, what are we communicating to the world?  What do we do about it?

 

 

Flow Questions with Leader Notes and Commentary

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

 

Separate your group into two teams – those who were born in the months of January to June, and those born July to December.  Have them come up with three reasons their birth months are better than the others.  Then give them time to tell the other team why they are better.

 

Leader note:  The idea is to create the idea of false elitism which will play out in the upcoming questions, and it lets your group experience subtle exclusion.

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

 

Read Colossians 2:16-23 What are the false ways of belonging?

Leader note:  Be sure you start reading at verse 16, as you will read the first part of the passage at the end of the study.

Commentary:  Some of the answers your group should come up with-

  • Right diet
  • Religion — rituals and festivals, asceticism (self-denial)
  • common list of “don’ts”
  • false humility — makes us think we’re better than we are (exclusionary)
  • special, spiritual, experiences, visions, elitism
  • good things become more important or necessary to add to Jesus (devalues Jesus)

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

 

Why is this way of belonging compelling?

Leader note:  Consider what you listed above and why these might be compelling – what makes them something those in Colossi would want belonging to mean and what makes them something we would want belonging to actually be.

 

Commentary:

Something I can control — salvation is in my hands, sense of security, boundaries, safety.
gives me a way to compare against other people
Tangible
comparison against other people
focus on the externals — don’t have to worry about the heart stuff.
2000 years of history — marked out God’s covenant people and their relationship with each other and him. There is some good parts to it.
gives you a way back “in” —
understandable and rational — objective.
can be seen by others.

 

In these rules, what do you get that you want?  What do you get that you don’t want?

Leader note:  Another way to ask this would be, “What are the consequences of trying to belong through those means?”

 

Commentary:

  • going to tire you out.
  • gives you a sense of your standing — I’m OK, all these things will cover my mistakes.
  • false sense of who I am.
  • Start to think I don’t even need Jesus – it’s what I do over what I am
  • These things justify me. — self-righteous, pride
  • tools from sin-management which keeps you from heart transformation
  • forces you to become a judgmental person — have to judge and put down others to justify your own performance
  • isolate — hiding, image management

 

What are ways people have tried to belong?  What have been the results?

  • NOT SINNING does not make me better, nor gives me the right to condemn.
  • FALSE HUMILITY — turning down attention and credit and admiration
  • SELF-DENIAL — not enough fullness of Christ.
  • isolation… Hide because it’s all about image management
  • LEGALISM: Grace versus works… I should be… I wish I was… I’m not allowed to…
  • GOD COULDN’T POSSIBLY THINK I’M IN TROUBLE — Jesus I’m sorry.
  • SCARY WITHOUT LAW-BOUNDARIES — false sense of safety, I can’t be trusted

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

What are ways you’ve tried to belong?  What have been the consequences?

Leader note:  Consider the list you’ve created.  What are ways you have personally tried to belong and what were the results?

 

Examples:  Growing up we were very legalistic, didn’t sing, dance, smoke or drink.  Problem was friends did all those things, I was alienated from them but tended to judge them.  It didn’t make me better.  When I would try to talk about Jesus, He got lost in all I was doing.  It wasn’t about Jesus, it was about what I was doing.

I decided to not allow our kids to watch TV.  Then I realized when I was telling other people it was more about having them see how much better I was than they were, not about why I did it in the first place which was to spend quality time with my children and to have them use their time in more productive and creative ways.

On the other side of this, I wanted to know more about the Christian faith, but I would see all these people who seemed too good for me, I would have to do too much changing in order to be able to go in a place with them – like stop smoking, cover my tattoos.  I thought it was about cleaning myself up and changing myself before I could let Jesus see me.

 

After everyone has had a chance to answer the question, read Colossians 2:8-15.  What is the treasure and how do we belong?

8-10:

  • Fullness of deity
  • in Christ, we’ve been brought to it.
  • life, transformed
  • filled to the fullness — we have all we need, we lack nothing, overflowing, complete, god’s work is done, content

11-12:

  • identity secured —
  • before Christ = separated, condemned
  • after Christ = forgiven, clean
  • OT: identity came through circumcision (shadow of what is to come)
  • NT: baptism
  • membership in covenant community with God
  • When Jesus died, you died
  • When Jesus rose, you rose — in Christ.
  • symbol of inward reality = same as OT circumcision

13-15

  • all sins forgiven
  • nailed to the cross
  • no longer in debt
  • debt came from… Law: list of charges against us — “legal indebtedness”
  • nailed it to the cross
  • that which condemns has been nailed to the cross
  • public spectacle…of (sin, death, and power)
  • The foolishness of Jesus, took wisdom of world and flipped it.
  • “irony of the cross” — dying and then rising.

 

How do we belong?

  • Forgiven, set-free, no longer slave to sin, etc.
  • Jesus

 

 

 

LIVE IT OUT

 

When we’re in those false ways, what are we communicating to the world?  What do we do about it?

 

Leader note:  Consider this as you are serving.  Follow up with these questions.

 

  • When you’re serving – one of the most powerful thing is it breaks…
  • When you serve and go as a critical self-righteous, false humility – they know you want to feel better about yourself.
  • Serve out of religious obligation – you hurt people, about you, self-righteous, no one loved, no one’s life is changed

 

 

PRAY:  As you end your time together, take a couple of minutes of silent confession where you come before God and confess how you have tried to belong in false ways – whether depending on yourself, rules, image management – whatever is the case, confess it to your forgiving Father.  Then thank God for His family and the work on the cross which makes it possible for you to belong as a beloved child to this eternal family.  Ask God to work on your heart to seek out those who want so much to belong, and just need to know how, and to extend the truth of Jesus alone being the way.

Colossians 2:1-7 // Greater Than Wk 2

 

November 3-4, 2012
Series:  Greater Than
Message:  Chasing Treasure
Passage:  Colossians 2:1-7

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

What are the Indiana Jones movies in the order they were released?

What are the marks of a great hidden treasure story?

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Read Colossians 2:1-7.  What does Paul tell you about this adventure?

What is the treasure? 

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

What makes this treasure worth finding?

Everyone is following a map that leads somewhere.  What are other treasure people seek?  What does their map look like?

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

Is Jesus the treasure you continue to seek? 

 

Look at the map qualities in the observation question. Where are you not deviating from the map?Where do you fall off the map at times?

What are the dangers and is He worth overcoming them? 

What are our resources?

LIVE IT OUT

As you consider the treasure, “in Christ, Hope of Glory”, with whom can you share the story of your treasure hunt?  How can you be their resource, and help them address their dangers?

 

PRAY:  As you end your time together spend time in overflowing thankfulness.  Either silently or as a group, give God the glory for how He has, and is, providing, blessing and protecting you.  Then ask God for wisdom and discernment as you run into the dangers of life, and that He will set your feet solidly on back on the map.  Pray He will continue to reveal to you that you are “in Christ” and what that means in your life.

 

 

Flow Questions with Leader notes

 

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

What are the Indiana Jones movies in the order they were released?

Leader note:  Have your group remember as many of the movies as they can, and then ask them why their choice is the favorite.    For your reference the movies are as follows:  Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple of Doom, Last Crusade, Crystal Skull

What are the marks of a great hidden treasure story?

Commentary:

  • adventure
  • danger
  • treasure is worth it
  • enemy
  • believable hero
  • map

 

Transition to the observation question with this:  “This passage has all the elements of a great adventure story.”

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Read Colossians 2:1-7.  What does Paul tell you about this adventure?

Leader note:  This passage has all the elements of a great hidden treasure adventure.  It may be easier to go through the text if you highlight resources, dangers and the map of finding and getting the treasure.

 

 

What is the treasure? 

Leader note:  The treasure is “In Christ, hope of glory”,

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

 

What makes this treasure worth finding?

Leader note:  Another way to ask this is “What does “in Christ” mean?”  and “What “hope of glory” mean?”.

 

Follow that up with what seems like a hypothetical question, “Is the treasure worth the dangers we will face?”   But you will see as you progress through the questions people will really have to come to terms with their answer “the treasure is worth it”, because life’s dangers are big and other treasures look pretty good.

 

Commentary:

In Christ: 

  • hope of eternal salvation
  • freedom from sin, death, etc.
  • gives purpose to life
  • All of what is given/sustaining Paul is available to you.  
  • Reconciles us to God – right relationship with God
  • I have a family, I belong
  • Not my strength – I have power that doesn’t run out.
  • I’m being purified… (have been purified)
  • Continual presence
  • All of who God is…
  • guidance
  • joy
  • nothing I can’t overcome
  • passion for his work
  • freedom from sin and fear
  • renovation
  • power to live.
  • Grace
  • Be part of the Kingdom of God, no and forever

 

Hope of Glory:

  • This is an eternal treasure for here and now and for forever… 

 

Everyone is following a map that leads somewhere.  What are other treasure people seek?  What does their map look like?

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

 

Is Jesus the treasure you continue to seek? 

Leader note:  Remind your group that after we find the treasure and are “in Christ”, we continue to see to be “in Christ”, we are still on the map, we still face dangers and we still need to call upon our resources.

Leader note:  Other ways to ask this question, “What map are you following and where is it leading?”   “What are you hoping in?  People put something like ambition, power, status, money as our treasure and the map we’re following is leading us to that treasure and includes making our own rules, being selfish, not being generous, spending less time with God, etc)

 

Look at the map qualities in the observation question. Where are you not deviating from the map?Where do you fall off the map at times?

Leader note:  It could be that you don’t find yourself in overflowing thankfulness, but that you feel like God hasn’t given you your fair share.  Or maybe you’re not spending time in God’s word, growing your roots, bearing fruit.

 

What are the dangers and is He worth overcoming them? 

Leader note:  Our dangers are basically the same as those Paul faced:  discouragement, believing there are other things worth pursuing, feeling alone and more.

What are our resources?

Leader note:  Hopefully your group will see each other as resources. Your accountability to each other, providing the safe place to discuss and grow in your faith, prayer partnerships, these are all resources. 

 

 

LIVE IT OUT

As you consider the treasure, “in Christ, Hope of Glory”, with whom can you share the story of your treasure hunt?  How can you be their resource, and help them address their dangers?

 

PRAY:  As you end your time together spend time in overflowing thankfulness.  Either silently or as a group, give God the glory for how He has, and is, providing, blessing and protecting you.  Then ask God for wisdom and discernment as you run into the dangers of life, and that He will set your feet solidly on back on the map.  Pray He will continue to reveal to you that you are “in Christ” and what that means in your life.

 

Colossians 1:15-23 // Greater Than Wk 1

 

Series:  Greater Than
Message:  What Only Jesus Can Do
Passage:  Colossians 1:15-23

 

INTRODUCTION

What is something what is the one thing in your life or family only you can do?

 

OBSERVATION

Before starting questions, read Colossians 10-14.  This is what God wants for you (Paul’s prayer):

Read Colossians 1:15-23.  What do you learn about Jesus and his unique ability to reconcile?

 

UNDERSTANDING

Where have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships of people to each other? 

Where have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships of people to God?

 

APPLICATION

Where in your life have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships?  Between you and God?  You and others?

 

Where are you resisting Jesus reconciling relationships in your life?

 

What do you have to believe about Jesus to let him do what only he can in reconciling this relationship?

 

LIVE IT OUT

What would it look like if we trusted Jesus to do what only he can do?  To our families?  To our friends?  Our community?

 

 

 

 

Flow Questions with Leader Notes and Commentary

 

INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES

What is something what is the one thing in your life or family only you can do?

Leader note:  This is something you have always done that you would not think of not doing, or that your family would not think of you not doing.  It could be building all the furniture or toy kits, it could be a recipe, doing the organizing of events, vacations, maybe it’s the dinner prayer or tucking kids in.  Be creative!

 

OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES

Before starting questions, read Colossians 10-14.  This is what God wants for you (Paul’s prayer):

Commentary:

  • ·         To bear fruit
  • ·         Strengthened with all power
  • ·         Growing in the knowledge of God
  • ·         Share in the inheritance of Jesus
  • ·         Joyful thanksgiving
  • ·         Great endurance and patience

Read Colossians 1:15-23.  What do you learn about Jesus and his unique ability to reconcile?

Leader note:  Consider as you read, what qualifies Jesus to reconcile us to God, us to each other, and us to Creation.  What are the qualities that uniquely qualify Him?

Commentary:

  • ·         He is the visible expression of the invisible God – I can see and know God through Jesus
  • ·         He is creator, firstborn of all creation – eternal, before all things
  • ·         Holds all things together – sustains everything, He is the source of life
  • ·         Firstborn among the dead – resurrected
  • ·         Head of the body/church/over all in the Body of Christ
  • ·         makes peace (Shalom)
    • o   Through his incarnation, sacrifice on the cross
    • o   Reconciles all things
      • Us to Creation
      • Us to each other
      • Us to God Reconciles relationships
  • ·         Has sovereign control over everything, In/through/for Him – both visible and invisible (thrones, principalities, rulers, elections, leaders)

 

UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES

Where have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships of people to each other? 

Leader note:  Consider marriages that were crumbling and Jesus brought reconciliation through forgiveness, mercy, unexplained change of heart.  Think of those who have had issues with parents, those who were estranged and found a way back to each other. 

 

Where have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships of people to God?

Leader note:  Jesus reconciled people to God through His death on the cross, before we knew Him, we were forever separated from God, except for the atoning sacrifice on our behalf, a gift of grace we received.  Because we are reconciled, we have the power from Jesus to break through darkness, break strongholds, eliminate fear, overcome sin.

 

APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES

Where in your life have you seen Jesus reconcile relationships?  Between you and God?  You and others?

Leader note:  If you have been freed of an addiction and through the power of Jesus broke that stronghold, you have been reconciled to God.  Perhaps you and a loved one were at odds, and through the forgiveness and Jesus interceding in the situation, you were reconciled.

 

Where are you resisting Jesus reconciling relationships in your life?

Leader note:  Consider relationships you could let Jesus reconcile – parents, siblings, coworkers – but instead choose not to.  It may be because you are afraid of additional hurt, or feel you are protecting your family from abuse. 

What do you have to believe about Jesus to let him do what only he can in reconciling this relationship?

Leader note:  It may be that you have to trust that if Jesus reconciles he can also sustain.  He can give you the strength to endure temptation, someone speaking against you, the possibility of a broken relationship happening again.  This is not a command to continue to enter into an abusive relationship, this is an invitation to reconcile what only Jesus can.  And then to trust Him to be bigger than, greater than, the brokenness, the troubled relationship, the addiction until such a time you are reconciled forever.  If Jesus gives you the power to break a stronghold, He can give you the power to stand strong against it. 

 

LIVE IT OUT

What would it look like if we trusted Jesus to do what only he can do?  To our families?  To our friends?  Our community?

 

PRAY:  End your time together praising Jesus for His unique power of reconciling you – first to your Creator, then to each other, giving you the ability to create unity within His family.  Pray God will give you wisdom in your relationships to know where you are not reconciled, where forgiveness and the qualities of Jesus need to be called upon to right the relationship.