Date: February 2-3, 2013
Series: Relationology
Message: Be Her Hero
Passages: Genesis 2:18-24, Deuteronomy 33:29, Psalm 33:20
INTRODUCTION – 5 MINUTES
OBSERVATION – 20 MINUTES
Read Genesis 2:18-24. What do you learn about the man and woman?
Leader note: Encourage your group to talk about all of the words used for man and woman, their responsibilities and the intended role for each.
Read Deuteronomy 33:29, Psalm 20:2 and Psalm 33:20. What do you learn about the words “help” or “helper”?
Leader note: For this question you will want to ensure you are using the NIV translation, otherwise the word helper is translated a little differently (not incorrectly, just not using the term “helper”)
Leader note: If this is not revealed in your observation of the passages, give this further definition of “help” and “helper”.
In Hebrew, the word for helper used in Genesis 2:18 and 20, is ezer, and it is only used in the Old Testament in the context of vitally important and powerful assistance. Ezer is a combination of two roots, meaning “to rescue, to save”, and ”strength”.
Ezer describes aspects of God’s character – he is our strength, our rescuer, our protector and our help. And ezer was the Holy Spirit’s choice of word to describe the first woman. Eve was someone who would provide valuable and vital strength and assistance to Adam.
UNDERSTANDING – 20 MINUTES
What are ways people misconstrue, or misuse the word “helper”, or misrepresent the woman’s role?
Leader note: Steer your group to discuss how culture has defined the woman’s role – in marriage, church and their communities – try to divert discussion from bashing a particular gender or group. It’s fine to discuss different religious cultures and beliefs, but don’t let this time be focused only on that, the main purpose of this discussion is to understand the intended role for women and the difference it could make if others recognized it as well.
What would it look like if women fulfilled the intended purpose of “helper” in marriage? In their communities?
Leader note: If you look at the definitions from the passages – helper is defined as valuable strength, rescuer, complementary and suitable, supporter and protector. Talk about how these attributes, the same ones used to describe God’s character and relationship to us, affect relationships, marriages, even responsibilities in their communities.
APPLICATION – 20 MINUTES
Where in your life has a woman fulfill the role of “helper”?
Leader note: You will be asking different questions to the men and women in your group.
Men: How have you, even subtly, misconstrue the word “helper” or a woman’s role?
How can you encourage or affirm the “helper(s)” in your life?
Leader note: If you are in a couple’s group you may want to have the men affirm their spouse with one or more of the words that describe helper from the passages, and how he sees her model that in their marriage and family. If you have a men’s group, you may want to have them write notes to their wives, or others who have fulfilled the role of helper.
Women: How have you, even subtly, deviated from being a “helper”?
Leader note: You may have women who have willingly taken on a “lesser” or subservient role in various aspects of relationships as it is easier, or they have misunderstood their role. Maybe they have even judged other women for choices to be stay-at-home moms, or on the other end of the spectrum – for choosing to work. These are all ways people dishonor the intention of the role of woman.
In what ways can you be a “helper” in your marriage? Family? Church? Community?
LIVE IT OUT
What would change in our families and communities is we embraced the intended roles of man and woman?